Real Estate CRM vs. Relationships: How to Build a Referral-Driven Business | Lance Pendleton

Lance Pendleton (00:00)
There’s a there’s a theory out there, thirty-two touches. For someone to remember you, you gotta hit them up thirty-two times for them to remember you, right? So we have these tooled e-blast systems and newsletters and reminders and all this stuff. And I go, well, let’s put this in real life scenario. Right? Q, if I showed up at your door 32 times a year and rang your doorbell, and when you opened the door, I like, Hey, I’m in real estate. Just wanna remind you, buddy. How long before you had a shotgun or a restraining order? Right? Like, and it’s that point, but what is it that we’ve just taught people? We’re teaching people like, no, I’m blah, blah, blah, blah. I’m in real estate, I’m in real estate, or I can do that. It’s it’s it’s digital harassment.

Quentin Edmonds (02:08)
Hello, everyone. Welcome to the *Real Estate Pros Podcast*.

I am your host, Q Edmonds. You see this big smile on my face? Because I am happy to be here, and I have a fantastic guest. Mr. Lance, I’ve said that before, so I don’t want you to think I haven’t said it, but I stand by it when I say it. And ⁓ this gentleman, he’s a solo entrepreneur. This this is how he quantifies what he does. He helps people to better help.

People. Come on. He helps people to better help people. He has something he called pre-TSD, and I cannot wait for him to explain that to you guys. He helped people who not just with just time management, but people that have time blindness. Listen, I listen, I am excited today. I’m so excited to introduce to some and to present to others, Mr. Lance Pendleton. Mr. Lance, how you doing today, sir?

Lance Pendleton (03:07)
I’m doing great, Q. And I already tell you, I do a lot of podcasts. ⁓ I host two national ones. And so far, before we even pressed record and started this, this is already the most fun and entertaining one I’ve been on in probably five years. So I gotta give you props and give you credit for that because just your infectious personality, who you are, how you present it, and what you bring to the table, I already and anybody that knows me knows I don’t say that that easily. So thank you, man, for having me on. I really appreciate it.

Quentin Edmonds (03:33)
I appreciate that. I’m a I’ma try to stay on course as much as possible, but I have to say just to you, I thank you for saying that. It makes me emotional. ⁓ you know, I’ve always strived to be the best communicator that I can be. And I’ve understood that communication has a 55, 38, 7 rule. 55% of it is body language, 38% is the tone, and 7% is actually what you say.

And so I’ve always felt like I’ve had this squeaky voice. I’ve always felt like I never said the right thing. But one thing I know for sure is that I can tell people, show people how I feel through my body action and through my tone. Because I am I believe in what I do. And so what you saying that that makes me emotional because it’s a reminder that the little things that I intentionally do, they matter. And so I appreciate you saying that so much. I really do. I really, really do.

Absolutely. Well, listen, sir. I am the type, Mr. Lance. I like to dive right in. So I would love for you to tell the people what’s your major focus these days? What’s your main focus these days? if you don’t mind, give us a little ordinary story, kind of how you got into the space that you’re in. Yeah. And I don’t I don’t know if you you’re pinned down to one market or not, but like tell me like where you operate at. So, sir, Mr. Lance, you you have the floor, my friend.

Lance Pendleton (04:46)
Thank you. I appreciate that. So yeah, I actually, you know, the the work that I do, I fell into accidentally. And I’ll and I give you a little bit of background story for me. Everything I have in my life is because of somebody else. There is nothing I have in my world that is by my own great genius invention. I’m not special in any way, shape, or form. ⁓ you know, my job is to take the things that other people have given me freely and, you know, package them in a particular way that allows ⁓ me to help other people.

be better at helping other people. And that sounds like such a weird, you know, tree huggy cliche and you know, and I and I’ll explain a little bit more, but ⁓ I I kind of fell into what I do. ⁓ I many, many years ago I had the first real love affair of my life. and I’ll give you an example. If you want to understand what the early Lance is like, my first drink I ever had, like first

Quentin Edmonds (05:33)
Yeah.

Lance Pendleton (05:39)
alcoholic drink was a screwdriver. Huh. Right? Vodka and orange juice. I got so sick from drinking those that I never drank orange juice again.

Now, not the alcohol part. I never drank orange juice again, right? And that’s what happened to me. So ⁓ I have been sober for 18 years now. I struggled with addiction for most of my early adult life. Yeah. I experienced ⁓ all the things that come with addiction, ⁓ homelessness.

⁓ loss of family, loss of friends, loss of jobs, loss of all of it. I, you know, went I I went to that place that, you know, again, many, many people hope they never have to go into or see their loved ones go into. And, you know, for me coming out of that on the back end, the one thing that I learned through that process really was that the only thing that really matters is how to be of useful purpose and service to other people. Right. Roomful of random strangers love me until I learned how to love myself.

And that was probably the first thing that began my career into starting from scratch all over again because I was 32 years old. I was unemployable. I was, you know, ⁓ I didn’t have a whole lot of things. I’d been thrown out of the only two colleges I tried to go to. Like I had there’s no reason someone’s gonna be like, Yeah, let’s hire that guy. Like he looks like a hot mess. So the reason I explained that is because when I started getting into the work world and I started, you know, getting my feet under me.

A lot of the things that I that I realized that I really was good at organically, naturally, ⁓ and learned about myself were the things that actually helped me build a business and build my career over working for other people. So, you know, I worked for Apple for for several years. I was a market trainer for them in the retail side of things. I ⁓ worked my way up into accidentally into the world of real estate. I was the director of learning and development because I love teaching people. I fell in love with behavioral psychology.

That became my background of study. and all of that kind of led me into working with real estate agents, believe it or not.

I was the chief innovation officer for the largest Sotheby’s Realty affiliate in the US. I then became the national head of agent development for Compass Realty when Compass had like 6,000 agents. So I’ve always been helping other people who help other people, right? And the one common thread through all of it that I learned was, you know.

So much of what people who are in a profession of working with others lose sight of or lose touch with is there’s core things that that they’re really good at. Then there’s things that they struggle with. And they spend a lot of time trying to correct and fix the things that they’re struggling with rather than just focusing on the things that they’re really good at and then finding some things like I call bowling bumpers to put around the other stuff so that they can actually operate and and grow their business and feel a bit better. So

I started my company ⁓ when I left Compass to work directly with people from a ⁓ from the like the agent perspective, coaching, training, and development work. Right. And I was told I showed up and they were like at the bank and they were like, what’s your LLC name? And I like, L C name. I had to have an LLC. And they were like, yeah, you need to have an LLC. I was like, okay, ⁓ pre-TSD. That’s the name of my company. And the lady looked at me and she was like, What the hell is pre-TSD? And I said, Well,

We all know what PTSD is. I have spent my entire life with pre-TSD. I am worried about shit in the future that hasn’t even happened yet. And those are the types of people that I end up working with. So I was like, that’s what we’re going to work with. So if you you know, I struggled with anxiety my entire life and stuff like that too. But like the that’s the audience that I actually try to work with and try to service for the people that are in that solo entrepreneur space ⁓ and or small team business space, whether it’s mortgage, title, escrow, real estate, all those areas that they work in service with other people.

Quentin Edmonds (10:12)
Yeah, man, Mr. Lance, sir. Thank you for taking us through the journey, ⁓ telling us where you are now. I mean, so much of what you said really connected with me. And as you’re talking, I wrote down something that ⁓ one of my mentors, guy named ⁓ Tim Ross, he said his he said his mama said this to him, right? So when I heard you say, you know, you package what someone else gave you and you give it back to other people, right? Tim Ross said his mama said to him.

If it’s true, it ain’t new. And if it’s new, it ain’t true. And so he it it always he he says that to ground himself, like no matter how you know, you know, different way he thinks and present things, it ain’t nothing new under the sun, right? And and if it’s true, if it serves the truth of purpose, it ain’t new.

Lance Pendleton (10:45)
I love that. ⁓

Quentin Edmonds (11:05)
Mm-hmm. And if people are giving you something you ain’t never heard before, be a little leery that cause it may not be true, you know? And so ⁓ yeah, please.

Lance Pendleton (11:15)
I’m gonna throw in by the way, that aligns beautifully with one of my core mantras in life. All wisdom is plagiarism, only stupidity is original. It’s the same thing you just said, right? Like it that’s the root. You said it beautifully. Actually his mom said it beautifully.

Quentin Edmonds (11:33)
My wife has a saying. She said, you know, and I got it from her, and I’m sure she probably got it somewhere else, but language is living. And so we just said different words, but it’s the same truth in those words that we delivered. And so ⁓ Mr. Lance, I often say this, and I’m gonna love asking you this. I often say destiny has no wasted moments. We are borrowing from every leg of the journey, nothing’s random.

All things work together, right? And so I would love to know, Mr. Lance, throughout your journey in this business space, and I’m sure you’re going to take it to life because, like you said, and I’m with you, those things are connected. We are who we are. We bring our authentic self to whatever we do. That’s what we should. But what has the moments taught you about yourself? What have they revealed? Has it been discipline, humility? Has it changed your look on innovation? What has the moments taught you about yourself?

Lance Pendleton (13:01)
That’s a great question. you asked me before we started who were the most influential people in my life? And the first person I said was my therapist. Yeah. Really honestly, without someone I think in our world in our lives help guiding us to understand because the outside perspective is very, very important, right? We I got my horsey blinders. Like I can’t really see what’s happening all the time for me. Yep.

Quentin Edmonds (13:12)
Because

Lance Pendleton (13:25)
But he said to me one time, you know, Lance, you you’re successful in spite of the things that go on in your head, not because of them. And that’s always stuck with me. Because the narrative and what I’ve learned over the years, that narrative in my head that tells me that I’m a fraud, I’m a fake, that I’m, you know, that I don’t know what I’m talking about, that the that the other shoe’s gonna drop any minute, all of that stuff that feeds in the background.

Is what for years I thought was the driver of why I had to prove myself and show and you know all those years of stuff that happened before for me that I had to prove, right? That I that I was, but that always sat back there. Yeah. And, you know, all the things that I’ve been able to do in my life, and I’m very blessed to have all the things that I haven’t been able to do. But at the same time, like I’ve had to remind myself, there is some.

skill set there, there is talent there, there are things there. Like I don’t need to be afraid of that part of it. And I also don’t need to to operate from a place of a lack of humility about that. I can be honest and real and let other people who want right to to be a part of the work that I do be a part of it. And if they don’t, that’s okay too. Yeah. Right. But that I had to learn that, as I’m sure you have too I’d be curious. I know I I know you’re supposed to be asking me questions. Yeah. But what would you say is the one thing that that you’ve learned over the years

from that driver of what’s kept you honest in it.

Quentin Edmonds (14:43)
Whoo, so I I would say the number one, and I don’t know if I said this word to you yet, and I believe I have authenticity, right? Like radical acceptance of me. It’s kind of similar to what you said, right? Like, and I can’t I I wish I could regurgitate what your your therapist told you. ⁓ but so I use a lot of scripture. So I’m gonna use it, I’m gonna use scripture, right? I’m gonna put it like this. It’s a scripture that says, ⁓ I’m beautifully and wonderfully made.

Another transaction transition, a translation says, I’m beautifully and wonderfully complex. Meaning I have this, I have to radically accept my design. And when I radically accept who I am, then comes the authenticity. And that has led me to my 2026 word, which is curiosity. So I think all of those things, I’m hopefully I’m answering your question. All of those things combined has kind of unlocked the potential in me because now.

Lance Pendleton (15:14)
Mm.

Quentin Edmonds (15:36)
I’m not self-confident, I’m self-aware because I know who I am and I work in compliment of everybody and not just to the detriment of everybody. So I hope that answers your question. But

Lance Pendleton (15:45)
It

does. It does. And and I, you know, I ⁓ I I love I love that too because working in compliment with other people, you know, a lot of what I teach when I’m working with people who work with other people is if if you bring your best self to the table, if you’re meeting with people, if you’re showing them all the great things that you can do for them, and if they don’t want that, great. Move on. That doesn’t have anything to do with you. That has everything to do with them, not you.

And that’s okay. It wasn’t the right time, wasn’t the right fit, they weren’t the right people. And here’s why: if you work in a relationship business, we are only as good as the next two, three people that someone refers us to, right? And and for me, if you don’t align with someone in that first engagement, and you go ahead and work with them anyway, and you change who you are to accommodate them too much, right? We always have to accommodate people to some extent, but if we change too much,

What’s going to end up happening is it’s not going to be a healthy relationship. It’s not going to work the way that you want it to. And then they’re not really going to refer you. Right. Whereas if you align with somebody, it works well. You bring them your true authentic self and you come with some confidence and a little bit of a little bit of ⁓ swagger is the wrong word. A little bit of of of real honesty, right? About who you are and how you help and all the things that you love doing with people.

And they click with that and they align with that. The relationship is good. It’s strong. And they’re going to refer you then to other like-minded people that they know. And that referral network, those connections that you have, that’s what you want. But we come into these relationships so fearful of not being liked. You know, I talk a lot about something called rejection sensitive dysphoria, which is this idea that some people have that they’re so worried about what other people think of them that they will change and chameleon themselves to become whatever that person wants, right?

And and you know, it’s understandable because it comes from a place of fear, it comes from a place of self-preservation that we all we all have. Yeah. And it’s and it’s it’s it’s not a bad thing per se if you’re aware of it. It’s when you’re not aware of it that all of a sudden you’re like, whatever you want, you know, and it’s where we now we’re taking phone calls at 10 30 at night because those people had bad tacos and their tummy hurts, and now I gotta be dealing with your problems. And you know, we teach people how to treat us. So what did you just teach that person?

I’m now available to you at whatever time you want with whatever problem you have. And I’ve just lowered my standards and myself for that purpose. Right. And so that’s not the lifestyle that you want and it’s not who we want to be. So we just have to get better, I think, on the whole. Yeah. At as you said, embracing that that part of authentic self, being okay with it, bringing it and just the rest will happen. It’s a little bit of faith mixed in that too. Yeah.

Quentin Edmonds (18:56)
Man, of course, of course you said so many things that align. I love how you talk about just awareness, right? Awareness of what you’re doing, who you are, what why you’re doing what you’re doing. And so when you talked about accommodating, you know, I I believe there’s a difference between accommodating and compromise. Like you said, we we got we always got to accommodate, right? That’s I mean, that’s the point of making the relationship work, the common, the community, the common unity work, right? How much of this is accommodation?

And how much of this is me compromising who I am and what I stand for. Right. And so, yes, I I I I absolutely love this conversation. so you know I mentioned *Atomic Habits*, that’s one of my favorite books. ⁓ talks about, you know, putting systems in place. And so everything you talk about, it doesn’t just happen by osmosis. It happens with intentionality. So we have to put some things intentionally in place to grow to where we want to be, right? So Lance, I would love to know on the operational side.

What is one operational thing that you’ve put in place, let’s say the last two years that has really changed the way you do business and how, you know, success has come. So talk to me a little bit about the structure and operational wise.

Lance Pendleton (20:06)
Well, I’m in a transitional period right now, too. So I think it’s an interesting question. There’s two things that immediately come to mind. One, and I know most people are gonna go, Lord, ⁓ AI. You know, I I I think that, and again, not in the typical, I’m gonna ask, you know, the the the ChatGPTs of the world, like, you know, what should I do to improve my business? No, I’m not talking about that kind of stuff. But but like Claude, for example, and Claude Co-work has become a huge part of my life because it’s a thought partner with me.

Quentin Edmonds (20:34)
Come on.

Lance Pendleton (20:35)
Right. And that thought partner process allows me to come in and work through certain things so that from an operation standpoint, I can put things in place that are a little bit aligned to a brand, aligned to a message, aligned to where I don’t start to get into the drift of, you know, where I’m trying to be all things to all people at all times. Something that I coach against. And you know, we we it’s the old saying of those who can’t do teach. Yeah. I’m trying not to live that right now because I myself am tr am faced with

Hey, I help people in a particular area, but I’m not living my own truth in that area right now. So I gotta kind of get back to it. And and that’s hard. Yeah. So that’s one, you know, using using ⁓ Claude Co-work as a thought partner to help me frame things out, to help have it create some structure for me. Yeah. is is big. ⁓ the second one I will tell you that’s from an operation standpoint, Plaud Note. Yeah. The ability to record conversations with people.

Quentin Edmonds (21:26)
You need.

Lance Pendleton (21:30)
Yeah. The ability from a phone call to a ⁓ a Zoom session to all the different areas to then have that feed into my Claude, right? And help remind me of hey, you should follow up with this person. Hey, this is something that you happen to mention that you were gonna get back to them on. It’s been three days. Did you get back to them on like a lot of those things, but also making me better at ⁓ not feeling like I had to hold it all, right? ⁓ and lastly, ⁓

I love empowering people who are better at something than I am because I know what I’m good at and I sure as hell know what I’m not good at. Like I know marketing is not my thing. It’s just not my thing. And so I look at other people and so hiring somebody to just handle the marketing side of what I do is really, really important. Handling ⁓ handing somebody things that I know, like outreach and engagement, it’s just I’m not great at it, right? Yeah.

That’s where I so that’s what I look at and it’s just put people in place that are just better and and trust that they’re going to be better at that until they prove to you that they’re not. Right. And it’s hard. We want control, especially if you work as a solo entrepreneur or a small business owner. We want to maintain the control because we built this thing. It’s it’s our thing. Yes, sir. So that’s that’s the hard part. But those are three big things that for me in the business I I would say made the biggest difference.

Quentin Edmonds (22:51)
Loving. What’s next for you, sir? What’s the next real goal if you do goals or if you do standards? Some people do goals, some do people do standards, right? But so what but what’s next for you? What are you looking to solve and scale next?

Lance Pendleton (23:03)
I heard it said once by a a a mentor of mine and I always appreciated this that goals are for people who want to win once.

Quentin Edmonds (23:09)
Come on!

Lance Pendleton (23:09)
And and I was like, that makes sense. Like she just said, like goals are for people who only want to win once. And I was like, okay. She’s like, you have to have more than just one current thing. It’s not about having 10 goals. It’s about what does that roadmap look like? What is the what are the next couple steps that you need to take? Right. And so ⁓ the big thing for me right now is really focusing in on helping people better understand what I do.

Right. Because what I do is kind of broad sometimes. And it’s easy to say, like, I help people who help other people, but what does that even mean? Yeah. The root for me right now and what’s next is helping somebody better connect to what drives their business. So if you’re in a business that helps other people like yourself, like ⁓ real estate agents, mortgage people, title people, investors, all of those different types of folk that work with other people. You know, we’re all given tools.

The problem is that if you’re in a relationship business, stop using sales tools because they’re built for sales people. Like you look at like these people using HubSpot and Salesforce and they’re like all these CRMs out there, Zoho docs and all this stuff, right? And these agents using these, they’re great tools for brand recognition. And that’s and you need that. I’m not saying you don’t need that. But I I talk to real estate agents and I talk to a lot of business owners too. And one of the things that’s consistent is they’ll tell you 90% of my business.

comes from like ten percent of all the people in my database. Mm-hmm.

Quentin Edmonds (24:28)
Uh-huh.

Lance Pendleton (24:28)
And I’m like, cool, but then why are you taking the 10% who are driving 90% of your income and lumping them in with every schmo you just randomly met somewhere that you have no idea what who that name even is? You have to take those people out and you have to make them sacred and you gotta put them someplace else. And you gotta I, you know. So it’s a long-winded way of saying there’s a CRM. Yeah, I help people build an SRM, which is a sphere relationship management tool. Who are those people?

That really at the end of the day love me, love my business, are there for me. They are the core. And those aren’t just past clients. I have two relatives in my life. They will remain nameless. And I’ll give you an example. One of them is an aunt that I love who is very sweet, very dear. I could call her anytime, tell her things are floundering, I’m having a bad day, and she’ll talk to me for half an hour.

She’ll be like, well, I’ve got this friend who I can connect you with. It’s again, she cares about me, cares about my business. I have an uncle who’s a giant racist. I am not putting those two people in the same category. I’m not talking to him, right? Like so why, why in our lives you have to have an area. So I’m focused next. The big thing that I’m working on is really creating an SRM for people, right? A way for people to understand and know things about the people that they care about the most.

With a supportive, helpful tool that reminds them, hey, it’s been like four months. You haven’t talked to this aunt in a while. Like, why? Here’s a couple of things that are happening in her world that you can make connections with and develop and foster that relationship.

Quentin Edmonds (25:51)
Yeah, that kind of stopped me in my tracks, man. ⁓

Never heard anything like this. But it’s so vitally important. A sphere recognition tool. Man. So man, I mean that that literally, so I when people talk, pictures kind of, you know, come in my mind. And I I’m getting emotional. What I just seen is the mending of a lot of relationships. That’s literally what I seen.

it’s almost like I seen DNA strains begin to like reconnect. So that’s that’s so as you talk, that’s that’s what

Lance Pendleton (26:24)
It’s interesting

because you just said that because the website that I’m building now for the tool that I’m creating, right, is literally an orb with a bunch of random dots moving in it. And some of them light up orange and they actually form this other nucleus that is that’s where our business comes from. That is the growth and longevity of what we have. Right. And yet everything that we learn in business that we’re taught is about reach, right? It’s about, you know, show them your value and it’s about fifty to you know, thirty two touches. And look.

My background in the thing that I love learning about is behavioral psychology. Yeah. And I give you this example.

There’s a there’s a theory out there, thirty-two touches. For someone to remember you, you gotta hit them up thirty-two times for them to remember you, right? So we have these tooled e-blast systems and newsletters and reminders and all this stuff. And I go, well, let’s put this in real life scenario. Right? Q, if I showed up at your door 32 times a year and rang your doorbell, and when you opened the door, I like, Hey, I’m in real estate. Just wanna remind you, buddy.

How long before you had a shotgun or a restraining order? Right? Like, and it’s that point, but what is it that we’ve just taught people? We’re teaching people like, no, I’m blah, blah, blah, blah. I’m in real estate, I’m in real estate, or I can do that. It’s it’s it’s digital harassment.

And that doesn’t improve the brand of you. That doesn’t make somebody feel connected. And by the way, look, a broken clock is right twice a day. Of course, you’re gonna get a couple people off that. But if all your money’s coming from and all of your success is coming from, and all of your work and the things that make you feel good.

are coming from a separate set of people who consistently drive it, I can’t treat those people the same as I treat the other people. That’s not that’s that’s not a successful healthy long longevity of a business. Yeah.

Quentin Edmonds (27:55)
So I I you know I gotta ask you this question because I ask every every person that comes on, and I’m definitely gonna love asking you this. And you’ve I mean you’ve already talked about it. I’m just gonna put it out there cleanly, though. I want to hear your philosophy on relationship building. I already said it, but I just I want to cleanly place it here because I feel like you still can expand even more on it. So let me just set it up. I would love to hear.

how business relationships have helped you. I would love to hear some of the people who’s in your circle, in your corner, that has helped you business wise. But as I know you, the business and the personal, they all, it’s all the it you can’t separate the two. And so I I throw that question out to you so that you can answer it the way you want.

Lance Pendleton (28:41)
I’m gonna throw the question right back to you.

Name me three people that have had the biggest impact on your life. Not your business, on your life.

Quentin Edmonds (28:47)
Josh, Will, and Jane.

Lance Pendleton (28:49)
Okay. And of those three people, when was the last time you talked to them?

Quentin Edmonds (28:52)
man, I talked to ⁓ someone don’t want to use hyperbole, but I would definitely say if I had to do an average, I would say twice a week.

Lance Pendleton (29:03)
How’s your business doing?

Quentin Edmonds (29:04)
⁓ I I I would not be driving without I wouldn’t

Lance Pendleton (29:09)
Okay. So you Yeah, I you answered the question. Right. Now if I ask this one of the first questions I asked, who are the three most important people or you know that had the biggest impact on your life, business in the past ten years? I’ll ask a client.

Wow. They can’half the time they can’t tell me. Or they’ll say, ⁓ well, ⁓ yeah, I had this ⁓ you know, partner back in the day, blah blah blah. That’s that. When was last time you talked to him? ⁓ five years. Right. We the the we’re we as a society and as a as a people are so inundated every day with this palace of more, right? More, more, more. It’s all insta.

It’s all it has to be instant. You know, I watched my I watched my daughter the other day, bless her heart. And and I I love her. She had friends that were visiting from London, and you know, they’re all sitting there. And I had this moment where like my heart swelled because they were all sitting out in the porch together. There was another they’re not watching TV. And I’m like, they’ve been out there for like three hours chatting. And I was like, Wow, that is a beautiful thing. And then I kind of looked, they’re all on their phones. They’re all having a conversation about.

Dumb shit they’re looking at on their phones for three hours. And I’m like, here I am thinking this is some sort of like magical gift the universe has displayed about human connection. Nope. Yeah. Nope. So the reason I say it is because that the the connection point, right? Yeah. We’ve lost that part. Yeah. And yet at the root of anything that I’ve ever seen that’s good, whether you want to look at how religious organizations or institutions work, whether you want to look at spirituality, whether you want to look at it’s all based on community.

I know when I was at my lowest point, there were only two things that were pulling me out of that. A group of people who had figured out how to help each other and the accountability that they provided for me. That’s it. Right? So I don’t care whether that’s addiction. I don’t care whether that’s your business. I don’t care whether that’s working through your, you know, a marital problem, whether

It is about how do I foster that stronger sense of community? How do I better bring people around in my orbit that share again that desire to do good, be of useful purpose and service to others, help people. And again.

There’s gotta be some drive behind that too. Yeah. Right. And and that comes. And and that’s a lot about what I talk about is how do we build some consistency around that. But relationships and how you work those things and the importance of Look, we we get away from the core every time.

Quentin Edmonds (31:29)
Yeah. I want to say two things real quick because I you know, I I’m trying to not make this about me, but used to say so many things at Spark. So one of my theme scriptures that I live by is James 5:16. And it says, Confess your faults one to another so that you can be healed. And so me and my group, we believe in ho confessing, holding space to confess to each other because that it holds us accountable, but then it creates a space to get

What’s off your heart out there for people to hold you accountable and know kind of, this is what you’re thinking, this is where you are. So that’s one one thing I live by. So we talk about accountability, confession. I I live by that. So when I I when you talked about your daughter, so my my dad’s a pastor, I’m a preacher. ⁓ and so one of my friends, she just had a baby. She had she had two young kids. One was maybe two, mom maybe was four. and she said she wanted me to.

Christen her kids. So, you know, I did the questioning. So I was questioning the younger child. And every time I went to touch her, the older child would knock my hand away. No. Wait a minute. Wait, correct correction. Every time I went to touch the older child, I was questioning the older child, the younger child would knock my hand away. And I kept trying to do it, and she would like literally my hand. And so my friend, she was getting embarrassed, but my dad stepped in with his wisdom and he was like,

Lance Pendleton (32:32)
Yeah.

Quentin Edmonds (32:50)
One thing we do not want to do is crush the spirit of young kids. It was like she’s showing you who she is. She’s gonna protect her older sister. And so, bro, that was moons moons ago. Now, that younger kid that used to hit my hand, she just graduated from LSU, probably like two years ago. She’s an advocate for people. She stands for what she believes in, and she believes in helping others.

Lance Pendleton (33:01)
That’s right.

Quentin Edmonds (33:19)
And now I’ve had a chance to watch our life play out. And I think about when my father said, you do not want to crush that young girl’s spirit. So I think about, you know, AI is rising. There’s different tools that these young people are using. The mindset for us as the older, seasoned people who’ve been around, not to crush their spirit. We may not understand the tools they use, but empower them to use whatever’s in their hands the way we know it can benefit this world.

And so, like when we look at these young people who have some wildly different ideas than us, different processes in us, but the world, like like I’ma say it again. I can’t say yours. I wish I could, but I’ll say mine. If it’s true, it ain’t new. And if it’s new, it ain’t true. There’s a lot of truth in what they’re doing. They just need a a path to be able to use what’s in their hands. Does that mean?

Lance Pendleton (34:14)
a thousand percent. And that’s why I use the term bowling bumpers. I want you to fling that ball however you want down the alley. It might not be the way that I do it. It might not be the spin that I have or the old school way where I don’t care if you go between your legs. It doesn’t matter to me. Right. What I care about though is can I help provide some bowling bumpers for you to make sure that you’re not flinging that thing into the three alleys over on the right? Because we all know that’s going to end you up in jail. So right. So that’s that that’s a you know, and and look.

This is the power of human connection. You and I don’t know each other. Yet in 25 minutes, we have I have found three different things that you and I have in common. Right. We talked a little bit earlier prior to this about Baltimore. Yeah. Right. Yeah. We talk about a love for helping people. Yeah. And my great grandfather and my grandfather, bishops of the church.

Right. So the the there’s no there’s there’s no mistake that as you said, people come into each other’s lives for different reasons and each of the networks and the connections and the relationships, right? But I now have an internal curiosity to keep up with you after this to understand what how’s his business doing? How is he doing? Yeah. This is a man that does a lot of good for people. This is a man who lives his truth, who tries to do something right for others. Yeah. Right. And and look at what you gave me. I looked at that whole thing with them sitting out on a porch watching

TikTok videos and rotten brains out over that thing and you know, being like, These damn kids these days, get off my lawn. You know, it’s like that that was my view of like, you know, what’s happening out there. And you just reframed that entire thing for me into but that’s their world, that’s their life. How do I just make sure that what’s right? We’re those bowling bumpers and make you you go, you watch all the TikToks, right? ⁓ Doesn’t doesn’t really affect me, right?

How do I make sure though that you’re living a decent quality of life? How do I make sure that you’re gonna graduate college? How do I make sure that you’re not, you know, gonna drive drunk or whatever those things are that, you know, provide the ground rules and foundations? But I, you know, I will say, you’ve got you’ve got good Bible verse that I have appreciated. I’m gonna give you the only one that still sticks with me to this day that came from a little old man.

In a meeting that I was at, that to this day I will never forget it. This man said nothing for this entire meeting. He put this little like gnarled finger up at the end, and they were like, Yeah, Bob. And he went, You know, the Bible says and it came to pass. Doesn’t say and it came to stay. Whoa! Whoa! It’s like everybody in the room busted out laughing. I was like, That is wisdom right there. That is wisdom.

This is like all the sermons I’ve sat through in my lifetime. I was like, that man just summarized something in six seconds that was completely worth it. And the Bible says that it came to pass. It doesn’t say and it came to stay.

Quentin Edmonds (37:02)
I don’t know how you just did that. You just unlocked.

A giving me language for a core philosophy I’ve been trying to teach. And I can’t go into it here. I think we’re probably gonna talk more. I I think probably thank you that wow. Yeah, man. Yeah, I can talk to me for hours. I mean, like literally, like I can I can I feel like we have not even scratched the surface of different things we talk about. ⁓ Mr. Lance, if if someone wanted to reach out to you, yeah, connect with you.

Lance Pendleton (37:16)
Then we’re gonna talk more.

Quentin Edmonds (37:34)
collaborate with you, learn more about what you’re doing. How can they get in contact with you, sir?

Lance Pendleton (37:39)
It’s real

simple. You can just Google me, Lance Pendleton, ⁓ and you can go to LancePendleton.com. ⁓ and if you Google, just put Lance Pendleton Real Estate. I’m gonna show up with everything. Unfortunately, I have the same name as a former professional baseball player. So if you Google Lance Pendleton, I did not pitch for the Yankees as much as I wish I did, but no, I I I did not. But no, LancePendleton.com is the easiest way to get a hold of me, get all my info there and everything else. And then I also, if you wouldn’t mind, I I do want to plug one thing.

Yes, sir. There’s a great group that I just started doing some work with from a mentoring standpoint called Foster Nation. So a lot of people don’t know that there’s ⁓ kids in foster ⁓ programs that when they turn eighteen, they age out of the system. And what happens there is they’re given a big bag with all their stuff in it. Goodbye, good luck, and God bless. There is no place for them to go. They have no skill set, they have no education background, they have no ⁓ work training.

⁓ and so, you know, it’s a great program that helps these kids learn how to get better ⁓ at ⁓ really trying to to establish a life for themselves. ⁓ because it it is ⁓ it it’s really a shame, you know. And and so again, Foster Nation, great program ⁓ for a lot of people out there that that deserve that.

Quentin Edmonds (38:54)
⁓ mate.

Not sure what’s going on here today, man. so my my parents, ⁓ they adopted five kids at one time. And so ⁓ we were very intricately involved in the foster care system. And I remember my dad when he brought it to us, ⁓ when he was like, you know, because it’s me and my my sister, who’s my biological parents, kids, and we had a family meeting, and he said, ⁓

We fostering these five kids, but it’s it’s no way we can let them leave. There’s no way we can, you know, let them go back. And and we was all in agreement, like absolutely. And we had we had my my parents adopted five kids at once. And the reality is it it drastically changed my life. I went from being the youngest to now being the oldest of five kids. So I’m you’re all about behavioral, you know, science, like so you can just imagine.

as a thirteen, twelve, thirteen year old boy, it impacts you. It it it does impact you. There’s no way it can’t because it it literally turns your life kind of upside down. Right. and for years I had to

Learn how to deal with those feelings. ⁓ but I as I stay here today, I’m so glad my parents made that decision, and I’m so glad that you brought that up, that initiative, because I know personally how that affects people.

Mr. Lance, I want to say ⁓ three things to you sincerely, sir.

One, I thank you for your time. I think time is our most precious commodity. And I know how the podcast works, right? Like, you know, we invite guests on, but your time is valuable. You can be doing anything. And so I thank you for your time.

⁓ secondly, I thank you for your story. I thank you for the gift of your authenticity, the gift of your vulnerability. ⁓ because you’re literally planting seeds. We don’t know when the seeds won’t take root, but they can take root at any given time and grow into something unimaginable. And so I thank you for planting seeds, like for you being authentic and telling your story. And lastly,

I thank people for their mindset. I thank people for the way they think.

And so I thank you for your mindset, for the way you think and bringing that mindset to this platform. Mr. Lance, I truly, truly appreciate you coming on today, sir.

Lance Pendleton (41:08)
You thank you, man. I thank you for everything you’re doing for everybody else. I really appreciate it. It’s been I told you the most fun in the podcast I’ve had in years. So and anybody that knows me, by the way, is gonna hear me say that and they’re gonna go, damn, that was really something unique. Cause he’s a grumpy old man. He didn’t like any of the podcasting world stuff. So thank you, man. I appreciate everything that you’re doing for everybody and for bringing your authentic self into this conversation. It makes my job much easier. So thank you, man.

Quentin Edmonds (41:31)
Absolutely. Well, listen, y’all heard Mr. Lance. this is if you’ve been following me, you know I’ve had some very unique podcasts, but nothing kind of quite like this. So if you guys been following, you know this is a special one. This will go down the archive. This can never be replicated or duplicated. And so ⁓ please follow Mr. Lance. Please, if you are in the business of helping people, so I I don’t know why, man, it just

I feel I want to. I said I say this scripture a lot, and I’m gonna land it here. ⁓ it’s Proverbs 11:25. It says, When you refresh others, you in return will be refreshed. And so, if you are a person out there and you know your authentic self refreshes people, please get in contact with this gentleman because he wants to help you as you help people. And so please, this is my ploy, this is my push. Get in contact with Mr. Lance.

His information is in the show notes. Let y’all worlds connect and let y’all continue to connect and change the world. So please get in contact with Mr. Lance. And I love this guy. Y’all can tell I’m talking highly of this guy. But y’all better make sure y’all subscribe here. Y’all gonna go check him out. You better make sure you subscribe here because I promise you we’re gonna continue to bring up amazing people just like Mr. Lance. So, sir, I say thank you again, my friend. I appreciate you and everyone else.

Y’all have an incredible day.